Recently, our preacher, Ron Babbit, sent a question to one of his friends in another state who teaches high school students. He asked the teacher to pose this question to his students: "What is the most difficult thing you have had to deal with growing up?" These are the responses from those students:
Boy (10th grade): "If I said that I have not looked at pornography, it would be a lie. My mom and dad have blockers on the Internet, but I know how to get around them. I wouldn't say that I'm addicted to porn; I just enjoy watching it when I am in the mood."
Girl (12th grade): "I am unsure of my sexuality. Sometimes I feel that I like guys and sometimes I feel that I like girls. I am attracted to both, and I just need to figure out which sex I like more."
Girl (9th grade): "My dad tells me every day that I am not pretty. He asks me why I can't be pretty like the other girls my age. He won't buy me any make-up because he says it won't help me look any better. He says it's a waste of money. I just want my father to like me."
Boy (12th grade): "My mom and I don't have any money. My dad is gone and my mom and I barely get by. We have had to move over 6 times in the past year, because we cannot pay our rent. It is very embarrassing for me because my friends are always asking me why I move."
Girl (10th grade): "I was raped over the summer two years ago and my dad didn't believe me. He said that I probably asked for it. To make matters worse, I became pregnant. Once my dad found out that the rape resulted in a pregnancy he just accused me of being promiscuous and told my family that I made up the rape story so that I wouldn't get in trouble. I had to change schools for a semester, and my father made me abort the baby."
Girl (10th grade): "I cut my thighs all the time. Every time that I feel pain or any time that I feel disappointment, I cut myself for punishment. I have been cutting myself ever since my mom and dad split up. I should have done more to keep them together. My dad is gone now and I never get to see him. It has been over three years since I have last seen him. I feel that my mom resents me but I don't know."
Girl (10th grade): "I have grown up in the church my whole life, and my dad is even a deacon in the church, but I hate church. I just go through the motions. I have to go to all the church functions and I have to put on my church face at school because everyone expects me to be that girl. Honestly, I have times where I can't stand God. I haven't prayed in over two years. I feel bad about it sometimes, but that is just how I feel right now. I'm tired of God being pushed on me from every direction."
Boy (12th grade): "I never feel that I am good enough. No matter what I do, I feel that I could do a better job. I want to succeed but feel that I can never please anyone. I just want to be successful, go to college, and follow in my sister's footsteps so that my folks will be happy with me."
Girl (12th grade): "My mom is a drug addict. My brother and I have to stay with my papa and meme sometimes. My mom never comes to any of my games and, when she is home, is just worried about getting her next fix. She can't hold down a job and is embarrassing. I put on my happy face at school, but really I want to just cry."
Girl (12th grade): "My uncle raped my sister and me when we were younger. We lived in Seattle and all of my other family lived here. We were raped over and over for a period of three years. Finally my aunt found out and got us help. My uncle is now in prison, and our family has no contact with my aunt. My father is in prison and my mom is dead. My sister and I now live with our aunt on the other side of our family. I struggle with trusting men. I actually hate men, all of them!"
Boy (9th grade): "My parents are divorced. It sucks...all my mom does is bad-mouth my dad and my dad just bad-mouths my mom. They don't even try."
Girl (10th grade): "My parents don't have any money. A lot of times, we don't even know where our next meal is going to come from. My dad can't even hold down a job. I guess that it's not all his fault though because he had some medical problems. My grandparents help out a lot but they can only do so much."
Girl (10th grade): "My dad just left mom for a younger girl. My sister and I caught him texting his girlfriend, and when he was sleeping, we stole his phone and showed my mom the texts. I don't get it. Why do men cheat? My mom cries a lot and now we live with my grandmother. I miss my dog the most. My dad won't let me bring my dog to my grandma's."
Boy (12th grade): "All I do is smoke weed. I love weed! My mom and dad know. They found out about four months ago. They were (angry) but I guess that they kind of got over it. My sister still gets me weed and we sometimes do it together. I don't think that it is bad. I just do it for fun and I don't feel that anyone is getting hurt from it. They actually say that weed is better for you than cigarettes. I don't know..."
These are the responses of kids in one small high school in another state, but it reflects life everywhere. We live in a world of hurting souls.
"Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience" (Colossians 3:12).
Showing posts with label Adultery. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Adultery. Show all posts
Sunday, January 09, 2011
Friday, October 29, 2010
Can Someone Who Has Messed Up Her Life Be Used by God?
A friend has had a difficult few months. In July, his wife left him and their children after committing adultery. He has been sharing his problems with me. We have been praying for reconciliation. A few weeks ago, she returned to him.
Today, he came to me with a question. He told me that his wife feels terrible about what she has done. She is depressed, feeling like the Lord cannot accept her and use her in his service anymore. My friend asked me, "Does the Bible say anything about God being able to use someone who has messed up her life?"
Immediately, I told him about the time that King David messed up his life. One night when he had little to do, King David caught a glimpse of a beautiful young woman. He decided to seduce her. They committed adultery. Not long afterward, they discovered that she was pregnant. After failing in a scheme to cover it up, King David arranged to have her husband killed. Then he married the young woman. (See 2 Samuel 11.)
Eventually, a prophet confronted the king about his sins (2 Samuel 12). David was humiliated by his sins. He repented and confessed his guilt. Although he lived with some awful consequences, he was forgiven by God.
In fact, he was not only forgiven; God continued to use him in writing portions of the Bible. After he had repented, King David wrote Psalm 51.
"Have mercy on me, O God,
according to your steadfast love;
according to your abundant mercy
blot out my transgressions.
Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity,
and cleanse me from my sin!
"For I know my transgressions,
and my sin is ever before me.
Against you, you only, have I sinned
and done what is evil in your sight,
so that you may be justified in your words
and blameless in your judgment...
"Create in me a clean heart, O God,
and renew a right spirit within me.
Cast me not away from your presence,
and take not your Holy Spirit from me.
Restore to me the joy of your salvation,
and uphold me with a willing spirit.
"Then I will teach transgressors your ways,
and sinners will return to you...
"O Lord, open my lips,
and my mouth will declare your praise...
"The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit;
a broken and contrite heart, O God,
you will not despise" (Psalm 51:1-4, 10-13, 15, 17).
God used a messed-up, forgiven man in amazing ways. He can used messed-up, forgiven people today in amazing ways, too.
My friend's wife is in an excellent position to be used by God. He does not despise her broken and contrite heart. He loves her.
Today, he came to me with a question. He told me that his wife feels terrible about what she has done. She is depressed, feeling like the Lord cannot accept her and use her in his service anymore. My friend asked me, "Does the Bible say anything about God being able to use someone who has messed up her life?"
Immediately, I told him about the time that King David messed up his life. One night when he had little to do, King David caught a glimpse of a beautiful young woman. He decided to seduce her. They committed adultery. Not long afterward, they discovered that she was pregnant. After failing in a scheme to cover it up, King David arranged to have her husband killed. Then he married the young woman. (See 2 Samuel 11.)
Eventually, a prophet confronted the king about his sins (2 Samuel 12). David was humiliated by his sins. He repented and confessed his guilt. Although he lived with some awful consequences, he was forgiven by God.
In fact, he was not only forgiven; God continued to use him in writing portions of the Bible. After he had repented, King David wrote Psalm 51.
"Have mercy on me, O God,
according to your steadfast love;
according to your abundant mercy
blot out my transgressions.
Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity,
and cleanse me from my sin!
"For I know my transgressions,
and my sin is ever before me.
Against you, you only, have I sinned
and done what is evil in your sight,
so that you may be justified in your words
and blameless in your judgment...
"Create in me a clean heart, O God,
and renew a right spirit within me.
Cast me not away from your presence,
and take not your Holy Spirit from me.
Restore to me the joy of your salvation,
and uphold me with a willing spirit.
"Then I will teach transgressors your ways,
and sinners will return to you...
"O Lord, open my lips,
and my mouth will declare your praise...
"The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit;
a broken and contrite heart, O God,
you will not despise" (Psalm 51:1-4, 10-13, 15, 17).
God used a messed-up, forgiven man in amazing ways. He can used messed-up, forgiven people today in amazing ways, too.
My friend's wife is in an excellent position to be used by God. He does not despise her broken and contrite heart. He loves her.
Sunday, October 17, 2010
Why Did God Command the Complete Destruction of Some Nations?
Last week, a co-worker was reading Deuteronomy 20. He came to me with an important question: Why did God command the Israelites to completely destroy some nations?
This is my attempt to deal with this difficult question. (And I acknowledge that my response may not be completely adequate, but at this time, it's my best response.)
As the text states, the Israelites were commanded to completely destroy some nations as they were entering the Promised Land so that "they may not teach you to do according to all their abominable practices that they have done for their gods, and so you sin against the LORD your God" (Deuteronomy 20:18). Leviticus 18 describes the total corruption of these societies. They tolerated and practiced incest, fornication, adultery, homosexuality, bestiality, and child sacrifice in service to their false gods. Evil was celebrated. Selfishness, brutality, and narcissism ruled the land.
"(W)hen God directed the Children of Israel to go in and conquer the Promised Land, He told them to destroy the peoples who lived there. This command was necessary because of the vileness of the pagan religions practiced in that good land. The most brutal worship of all was that demanded by Moloch. This cruel demon was represented by an iron idol with hollow belly and with both arms bent in front in a cradling position. A fire was built in the hollow belly, and each mother was required to sacrifice her first-born by placing him in the idol's arms to be burned alive. During this horrible ceremony, the priests and priestesses of Moloch beat drums which reached a deafening crescendo as the mother laid her baby in the idol's arms. The purpose, of course, was to keep the mother from hearing her baby's screams" (Drums of Moloch, Herbert C. Casteel, pp. 94-95).
Two factors made matters worse for the inhabitants of the Promised Land: 1. They had a knowledge of their sins and of the true God who expected better from them. 2. They had been given centuries to repent.
Like all people, they had a basic understanding of right and wrong. However, they chose to "suppress the truth" (Romans 1:18). "Though they know God's decree that those who practice such things deserve to die, they not only do them but give approval to those who practice them" (Romans 1:32).
Although easy to overlook, we should also recognize that the pagan nations were well aware of the Lord's judgment long before destruction came upon them. In fact, Balaam was an internationally-known prophet of the Lord from a pagan land (Numbers 22). The true God was known in lands far away from the Israelites; and they did not have exclusive access to his prophets. Furthermore, as Rahab the pagan prostitute testified before her city was destroyed, "I know that the LORD has given you the land, and that the fear of you has fallen upon us, and that all the inhabitants of the land melt away before you. For we have heard how the LORD dried up the water of the Red Sea before you when you came out of Egypt..." (Joshua 2:9-10). For at least 40 years, the people of Jericho knew that their judgment day was coming, but they expressed no interest in changing their ways as the people of Ninevah would several centuries later (Jonah 3:6-10).
In addition, it should be noted that the nations inhabiting the Promised Land were given 400 years to repent (Genesis 15:16; Deuteronomy 9:5). Their destruction came fairly quickly, but it was only after God had waited patiently for centuries for them to change their hearts.
Also, different rules of warfare existed against the nations within the Promised Land than against the nations outside those boundaries. The nations within the Promised Land faced total destruction (Deuteronomy 20:16-18). They were facing the judgment of God. More conventional standards of warfare applied to enemy nations outside the Promised Land (Deuteronomy 20:10-15).
Finally, it should be noted that God's grace was extended to individuals even as their societies faced total annihilation. The prostitute Rahab and her family found grace. They were spared from God's judgment because they placed their faith in God and followed the instructions that they were given (Joshua 2-3).
This is my attempt to deal with this difficult question. (And I acknowledge that my response may not be completely adequate, but at this time, it's my best response.)
As the text states, the Israelites were commanded to completely destroy some nations as they were entering the Promised Land so that "they may not teach you to do according to all their abominable practices that they have done for their gods, and so you sin against the LORD your God" (Deuteronomy 20:18). Leviticus 18 describes the total corruption of these societies. They tolerated and practiced incest, fornication, adultery, homosexuality, bestiality, and child sacrifice in service to their false gods. Evil was celebrated. Selfishness, brutality, and narcissism ruled the land.
"(W)hen God directed the Children of Israel to go in and conquer the Promised Land, He told them to destroy the peoples who lived there. This command was necessary because of the vileness of the pagan religions practiced in that good land. The most brutal worship of all was that demanded by Moloch. This cruel demon was represented by an iron idol with hollow belly and with both arms bent in front in a cradling position. A fire was built in the hollow belly, and each mother was required to sacrifice her first-born by placing him in the idol's arms to be burned alive. During this horrible ceremony, the priests and priestesses of Moloch beat drums which reached a deafening crescendo as the mother laid her baby in the idol's arms. The purpose, of course, was to keep the mother from hearing her baby's screams" (Drums of Moloch, Herbert C. Casteel, pp. 94-95).
Two factors made matters worse for the inhabitants of the Promised Land: 1. They had a knowledge of their sins and of the true God who expected better from them. 2. They had been given centuries to repent.
Like all people, they had a basic understanding of right and wrong. However, they chose to "suppress the truth" (Romans 1:18). "Though they know God's decree that those who practice such things deserve to die, they not only do them but give approval to those who practice them" (Romans 1:32).
Although easy to overlook, we should also recognize that the pagan nations were well aware of the Lord's judgment long before destruction came upon them. In fact, Balaam was an internationally-known prophet of the Lord from a pagan land (Numbers 22). The true God was known in lands far away from the Israelites; and they did not have exclusive access to his prophets. Furthermore, as Rahab the pagan prostitute testified before her city was destroyed, "I know that the LORD has given you the land, and that the fear of you has fallen upon us, and that all the inhabitants of the land melt away before you. For we have heard how the LORD dried up the water of the Red Sea before you when you came out of Egypt..." (Joshua 2:9-10). For at least 40 years, the people of Jericho knew that their judgment day was coming, but they expressed no interest in changing their ways as the people of Ninevah would several centuries later (Jonah 3:6-10).
In addition, it should be noted that the nations inhabiting the Promised Land were given 400 years to repent (Genesis 15:16; Deuteronomy 9:5). Their destruction came fairly quickly, but it was only after God had waited patiently for centuries for them to change their hearts.
Also, different rules of warfare existed against the nations within the Promised Land than against the nations outside those boundaries. The nations within the Promised Land faced total destruction (Deuteronomy 20:16-18). They were facing the judgment of God. More conventional standards of warfare applied to enemy nations outside the Promised Land (Deuteronomy 20:10-15).
Finally, it should be noted that God's grace was extended to individuals even as their societies faced total annihilation. The prostitute Rahab and her family found grace. They were spared from God's judgment because they placed their faith in God and followed the instructions that they were given (Joshua 2-3).
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
Teaching the Ten Commandments to a Child
Since our son Christopher was 2 or 3 years old, we have helped him memorize Scriptures. After our family meal, I have read a verse from the Bible and he has repeated it. After memorizing it, we have moved on to another verse.
Lately, we have been memorizing the ten commandments. I did not plan ahead, so I was a little unprepared for some of the challenges of teaching the ten commandments to a 6-year old boy.
A few nights ago, our conversation went something like this...
Me: This is your new memory verse: "You shall not murder" (Exodus 20:13).
Christopher: "You shall not murder" (Exodus 20:13).
Me: Do you know what murder is?
Christopher: Shooting someone?
Me: Yes. That would be one way to commit murder.
Janet: But murder is not just shooting someone. It's killing someone.
Christopher: Like a soldier?
Me: Well, a soldier can commit murder when he kills someone, but it's not necessarily murder when a soldier kills someone. When a soldier kills someone who is trying to kill others, he is not murdering the bad guy. He is protecting innocent people from being murdered. To murder someone is to intentionally kill an innocent person who is not a threat to anyone. When American soldiers kill a terrorist who is trying to murder innocent people, they are not committing murder. They are doing good. They are protecting innocent people from murderers.
I thought I had finished the most difficult portion of the ten commandments until we arrived at the next one a few nights later.
Me: Okay, our next memory verse is..."You shall not commit adultery" (Exodus 20:14). (At this point, I'm thinking: Great! How am I going to explain this one to a little boy? Why don't I look ahead before I read these verses?)
Christopher: "You shall not commit adultery" (Exodus 20:14).
Me: Do you know what that means?
Christopher: No.
Me: It means that if you are married, you can't have another girlfriend. If a girl you like is married, she can't be your girlfriend either.
Christopher: Ten girls at school would like to be my girlfriend.
I could only smile and say, "I'm sure they would."
Lately, we have been memorizing the ten commandments. I did not plan ahead, so I was a little unprepared for some of the challenges of teaching the ten commandments to a 6-year old boy.
A few nights ago, our conversation went something like this...
Me: This is your new memory verse: "You shall not murder" (Exodus 20:13).
Christopher: "You shall not murder" (Exodus 20:13).
Me: Do you know what murder is?
Christopher: Shooting someone?
Me: Yes. That would be one way to commit murder.
Janet: But murder is not just shooting someone. It's killing someone.
Christopher: Like a soldier?
Me: Well, a soldier can commit murder when he kills someone, but it's not necessarily murder when a soldier kills someone. When a soldier kills someone who is trying to kill others, he is not murdering the bad guy. He is protecting innocent people from being murdered. To murder someone is to intentionally kill an innocent person who is not a threat to anyone. When American soldiers kill a terrorist who is trying to murder innocent people, they are not committing murder. They are doing good. They are protecting innocent people from murderers.
I thought I had finished the most difficult portion of the ten commandments until we arrived at the next one a few nights later.
Me: Okay, our next memory verse is..."You shall not commit adultery" (Exodus 20:14). (At this point, I'm thinking: Great! How am I going to explain this one to a little boy? Why don't I look ahead before I read these verses?)
Christopher: "You shall not commit adultery" (Exodus 20:14).
Me: Do you know what that means?
Christopher: No.
Me: It means that if you are married, you can't have another girlfriend. If a girl you like is married, she can't be your girlfriend either.
Christopher: Ten girls at school would like to be my girlfriend.
I could only smile and say, "I'm sure they would."
Wednesday, July 01, 2009
Are There Really Men Like That?
The young woman's father abused her mother and repeatedly committed adultery. To this day, she does not know how many siblings she has. Her father had too many mistresses to count.
In addition, she is married to an irresponsible man. He does not keep a job for more than a few weeks at a time. He is an alcoholic.
However, the young woman has become interested in something better than she has experienced in life. She has become interested in following Christ.
While listening to a radio program one day, she heard a man explaining Ephesians 5:25 ("Husbands, love your wives just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her"). The preacher encouraged men to step up and love their wives by protecting them and providing for their needs. He told them to care for their wives and children.
After listening to the program, she asked a penetrating question: "Are there really men like that?" The men in her life had been nothing like that.
Her question prompted me to consider two important thoughts:
1. Many people have never seen the Christian faith in action...at least not up close and personally. They have lived without the benefit of really knowing a committed Christian. They need to see that there really are "men like that."
2. It's okay to be different. A man who loves, protects, and provides for his family may be atypical among some people, but he is playing a vital role in making the Christian faith attractive. Followers of Jesus Christ do not need to think and act like everyone around them in order to be relevant to the culture. As Jesus said, "You are the salt of the earth, but if salt has lost its taste, how shall its saltiness be restored? It is no longer good for anything except to be thrown out and trampled under people's feet" (Matthew 5:13, English Standard Version).
The world needs a few more men and women who are different, who are involved in the lives of hurting people, and who think and act like they have been influenced by the Spirit of God.
In addition, she is married to an irresponsible man. He does not keep a job for more than a few weeks at a time. He is an alcoholic.
However, the young woman has become interested in something better than she has experienced in life. She has become interested in following Christ.
While listening to a radio program one day, she heard a man explaining Ephesians 5:25 ("Husbands, love your wives just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her"). The preacher encouraged men to step up and love their wives by protecting them and providing for their needs. He told them to care for their wives and children.
After listening to the program, she asked a penetrating question: "Are there really men like that?" The men in her life had been nothing like that.
Her question prompted me to consider two important thoughts:
1. Many people have never seen the Christian faith in action...at least not up close and personally. They have lived without the benefit of really knowing a committed Christian. They need to see that there really are "men like that."
2. It's okay to be different. A man who loves, protects, and provides for his family may be atypical among some people, but he is playing a vital role in making the Christian faith attractive. Followers of Jesus Christ do not need to think and act like everyone around them in order to be relevant to the culture. As Jesus said, "You are the salt of the earth, but if salt has lost its taste, how shall its saltiness be restored? It is no longer good for anything except to be thrown out and trampled under people's feet" (Matthew 5:13, English Standard Version).
The world needs a few more men and women who are different, who are involved in the lives of hurting people, and who think and act like they have been influenced by the Spirit of God.
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
When a Spiritual Leader Falls to Homosexuality
Nearly a decade ago, Janet and I were members of a small Bible study group. We had been members of the group for a few years. We were a close group, but we were not as close as we had thought. We did not know each other's temptations and weaknesses as well as we would have liked. We were led by a severely flawed man who kept his sins hidden from us.
Without warning, our leader stepped down from leading the group. He asked me to take over the Bible study sessions. Then he left his wife and children.
We were confused. I tried to contact him, believing that he simply needed a little encouragement to do the right thing and return to his wife and children. He did not respond. A few weeks later, he moved to another city with his homosexual partner. We never saw it coming. We never expected adultery; and we would have never believed that he would leave his family for another man. After all, he was a small group leader in a church dedicated to Christ and to biblical ethics. It did not make sense. We were paralyzed.
While it may not be very common yet, this kind of sin occurs. With that in mind, I would like to share a few ideas about how to handle it.
1. Recognize that the fallen leader is hurting. He has emotional issues that run deep. He may have been a victim of sexual abuse at some point in his development. As Anita Worthen and Bob Davies write in Someone I Love is Gay: How Family and Friends Can Respond, "The roots of homosexuality are mainly emotional and center on issues like envy (I'm not as masculine/secure/aggressive as other men), loneliness (nobody would love me if they knew the real me) and deception (I'll never amount to anything)" (p. 174). He has struggled and failed. He needs to be offered help. Pray that he will accept it.
2. Recognize that the fallen leader has hurt his family. His wife and children are the victims. The church must show compassion and acceptance. The family must not be ostracized. They need their Christian friends like never before. They need the stability of people who care about them and their welfare. They need friends who will stand by them, listen to them, and pray with them.
3. Recognize that the fallen leader's sins are as serious as hell. The man's soul is in jeopardy. As Jude wrote, "In a similar way, Sodom and Gomorrah and the surrounding towns gave themselves up to sexual immorality and perversion. They serve as an example of those who suffer the punishment of eternal fire" (Jude 7). The fallen leader needs love and prayer. He needs encouragement to turn from his sins. He needs to understand that his sins have serious consequences. He needs to comprehend his need for God and his life-changing grace. Otherwise, he is lost forever.
I hope that no one who reads this post will ever go through this kind of situation; but if you do, I hope these words help as you try to deal with it in a God-honoring way.
Without warning, our leader stepped down from leading the group. He asked me to take over the Bible study sessions. Then he left his wife and children.
We were confused. I tried to contact him, believing that he simply needed a little encouragement to do the right thing and return to his wife and children. He did not respond. A few weeks later, he moved to another city with his homosexual partner. We never saw it coming. We never expected adultery; and we would have never believed that he would leave his family for another man. After all, he was a small group leader in a church dedicated to Christ and to biblical ethics. It did not make sense. We were paralyzed.
While it may not be very common yet, this kind of sin occurs. With that in mind, I would like to share a few ideas about how to handle it.
1. Recognize that the fallen leader is hurting. He has emotional issues that run deep. He may have been a victim of sexual abuse at some point in his development. As Anita Worthen and Bob Davies write in Someone I Love is Gay: How Family and Friends Can Respond, "The roots of homosexuality are mainly emotional and center on issues like envy (I'm not as masculine/secure/aggressive as other men), loneliness (nobody would love me if they knew the real me) and deception (I'll never amount to anything)" (p. 174). He has struggled and failed. He needs to be offered help. Pray that he will accept it.
2. Recognize that the fallen leader has hurt his family. His wife and children are the victims. The church must show compassion and acceptance. The family must not be ostracized. They need their Christian friends like never before. They need the stability of people who care about them and their welfare. They need friends who will stand by them, listen to them, and pray with them.
3. Recognize that the fallen leader's sins are as serious as hell. The man's soul is in jeopardy. As Jude wrote, "In a similar way, Sodom and Gomorrah and the surrounding towns gave themselves up to sexual immorality and perversion. They serve as an example of those who suffer the punishment of eternal fire" (Jude 7). The fallen leader needs love and prayer. He needs encouragement to turn from his sins. He needs to understand that his sins have serious consequences. He needs to comprehend his need for God and his life-changing grace. Otherwise, he is lost forever.
I hope that no one who reads this post will ever go through this kind of situation; but if you do, I hope these words help as you try to deal with it in a God-honoring way.
Thursday, April 17, 2008
Families and Poverty
"Wives, submit to your own husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.
"Husbands, love your wives and do not be bitter toward them.
"Children, obey your parents in all things, for this is well pleasing to the Lord.
"Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged" (Colossians 3:18-21, NKJV).
Earlier this week, I heard a radio news report which stated that the state of Oklahoma spends hundreds of millions of dollars annually fighting poverty caused by divorce and out-of-wedlock births.
Today, I received a letter from FamilyLife with these striking statistics:
*41% of married couples today admit to infidelity
*57% of men admit they've committed infidelity in every relationship they've had
*54% of women admit the same
*40% of children today will grow up without a father in the home
*A recently divorced man is nearly 9 times more likely to commit suicide than his female counterpart
Although I'm not an expert in this field, my personal observations do not conflict with what I have been hearing and reading this week. After 7 years of volunteering in urban ministry, I have a difficult time thinking of many intact families who are living in poverty unless they are dealing with physical or mental health problems. Adultery, divorce, and single-parent households seem to be normal among the poor, the middle-class, and the wealthy.
People are hurting. They are living with the bitterness of betrayal and abandonment. They are living with the guilt of betraying their spouses and abandoning their families. They do not know how to raise their children alone. They do not know how to love and respect their husbands and wives. They do not know how to honor their parents who have made mistakes. Their relationships are frayed; and it has affected them emotionally, socially, and spiritually.
People need good news. They need forgiveness and an opportunity to start life over. They need hope. They need to learn biblical principles concerning life and relationships. They need Christ.
Christians and churches have been called by God to help meet these needs.
"Husbands, love your wives and do not be bitter toward them.
"Children, obey your parents in all things, for this is well pleasing to the Lord.
"Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged" (Colossians 3:18-21, NKJV).
Earlier this week, I heard a radio news report which stated that the state of Oklahoma spends hundreds of millions of dollars annually fighting poverty caused by divorce and out-of-wedlock births.
Today, I received a letter from FamilyLife with these striking statistics:
*41% of married couples today admit to infidelity
*57% of men admit they've committed infidelity in every relationship they've had
*54% of women admit the same
*40% of children today will grow up without a father in the home
*A recently divorced man is nearly 9 times more likely to commit suicide than his female counterpart
Although I'm not an expert in this field, my personal observations do not conflict with what I have been hearing and reading this week. After 7 years of volunteering in urban ministry, I have a difficult time thinking of many intact families who are living in poverty unless they are dealing with physical or mental health problems. Adultery, divorce, and single-parent households seem to be normal among the poor, the middle-class, and the wealthy.
People are hurting. They are living with the bitterness of betrayal and abandonment. They are living with the guilt of betraying their spouses and abandoning their families. They do not know how to raise their children alone. They do not know how to love and respect their husbands and wives. They do not know how to honor their parents who have made mistakes. Their relationships are frayed; and it has affected them emotionally, socially, and spiritually.
People need good news. They need forgiveness and an opportunity to start life over. They need hope. They need to learn biblical principles concerning life and relationships. They need Christ.
Christians and churches have been called by God to help meet these needs.
Tuesday, March 13, 2007
Sexual Immorality
In an interview with a Chicago newspaper yesterday, Marine General Peter Pace, the chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, said, "Homosexual acts between individuals is immoral." In addition, he stated that adultery is immoral.
His comments have stirred up a mild controversy. Some people have demanded an apology from him. However, General Pace was correct. Homosexual activity and adultery are immoral.
Jesus Christ taught, "Surely, you have read in the Scriptures: When God made the world, 'he made them male and female.' And God said, 'So a man will leave his father and mother and be united with his wife, and the two will become one body.' So there are not two, but one. God has joined the two together, so no one should seperate them" (Matthew 19:4-6, NCV). He taught that God intended for sex to be enjoyed within the boundaries of a marriage between a man and a woman, where the two would become "one body." That is the definition of sexual morality.
When the apostle Paul was describing humanity's rebellion against God, he mentioned, "Women stopped having natural sex and started having sex with other women. In the same way, men stopped having natural sex and began wanting each other. Men did shameful things with other men, and in their bodies they received the punishment for those wrongs" (Romans 1:26-27, NCV).
In his first letter to the church of God in Corinth, the apostle Paul wrote, "Surely you know that the people who do wrong will not inherit God's kingdom. Do not be fooled. Those who sin sexually, worship idols, take part in adultery, those who are male prostitutes, or men who have sexual relations with other men, those who steal, are greedy, get drunk, lie about others, or rob---these people will not inherit God's kingdom. In the past, some of you were like that, but you were washed clean. You were made holy, and you were made right with God in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and in the Spirit of our God" (1 Corinthians 6:9-11, NCV). Thankfully, God still washes sinners clean, makes sinners holy, and makes sinners right with himself. Otherwise, each of us would lead hopeless lives in addiction to our sins and in opposition to God.
God still saves and changes lives.
His comments have stirred up a mild controversy. Some people have demanded an apology from him. However, General Pace was correct. Homosexual activity and adultery are immoral.
Jesus Christ taught, "Surely, you have read in the Scriptures: When God made the world, 'he made them male and female.' And God said, 'So a man will leave his father and mother and be united with his wife, and the two will become one body.' So there are not two, but one. God has joined the two together, so no one should seperate them" (Matthew 19:4-6, NCV). He taught that God intended for sex to be enjoyed within the boundaries of a marriage between a man and a woman, where the two would become "one body." That is the definition of sexual morality.
When the apostle Paul was describing humanity's rebellion against God, he mentioned, "Women stopped having natural sex and started having sex with other women. In the same way, men stopped having natural sex and began wanting each other. Men did shameful things with other men, and in their bodies they received the punishment for those wrongs" (Romans 1:26-27, NCV).
In his first letter to the church of God in Corinth, the apostle Paul wrote, "Surely you know that the people who do wrong will not inherit God's kingdom. Do not be fooled. Those who sin sexually, worship idols, take part in adultery, those who are male prostitutes, or men who have sexual relations with other men, those who steal, are greedy, get drunk, lie about others, or rob---these people will not inherit God's kingdom. In the past, some of you were like that, but you were washed clean. You were made holy, and you were made right with God in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and in the Spirit of our God" (1 Corinthians 6:9-11, NCV). Thankfully, God still washes sinners clean, makes sinners holy, and makes sinners right with himself. Otherwise, each of us would lead hopeless lives in addiction to our sins and in opposition to God.
God still saves and changes lives.
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