Helping Girls by Helping Boys

I have been thinking about boys and girls in the church this week.

It started when Christopher came home from a weekend with his Grammie. In addition to stories about his train ride and fishing adventures, he told me about his great class at the First Christian Church in Fairland, Oklahoma. He had seen a video in his class in which he saw snakes, guns, and bombs. He loved it! A couple of months ago, when we visited the congregation, he loved participating as a soldier in the re-enactment of Christ's arrest. I thought, Someone in this church really knows how to appeal to little boys.

Later in the week, I read an article in Christianity Today which can be found at www.christianitytoday.com/ct/2009/august/16.22.html. One paragraph caught my attention:

"The ratio of devoutly Christian young women to men is far from even. Among evangelical churchgoers, there are about three single women for every two single men. This is the elephant in the corner of almost every congregation--a shortage of young Christian men."

It occurred to me that if churches and Christian parents could develop their boys into strong and good Christian young men, they would be doing their girls a huge favor. They would be developing a good pool of potential Christian husbands for their young Christian women.

This could mean some churches will need to change their emphasis (especially in children's classes and youth groups). When teaching about Jesus, they may need to recognize that Christ possesses some often-overlooked rugged personal qualities that appeal to boys (and men). In addition to recognizing Jesus' love and kindness, teachers should recognize his courage, conviction, determination, bluntness, and strength of character. In addition to singing "girly songs" (as Christopher calls them), churches could sing a few songs about God being powerful and Christians being strong in a spiritual battle for the souls of the people we love. Boys and men could be encouraged to be responsible, to take initiative, to protect the weak, and to challenge injustices around them (like bullying or abuse). These types of things have a particular appeal to men and boys, and they are completely Christ-like and biblical.

When churches recognize that boys have different needs than girls, they will be able to attract, retain, and develop boys. They will be able to increase the number of solid, godly men for their young women to marry someday. They will be doing a favor for every girl who would have settled for something less otherwise.

Messages from Campus Ministry United Workshop

My friend Wes Woodell serves a church that is trying to reach unbelievers in San Francisco. He left me a comment last night about some great messages from the recent Campus Ministry United Workshop. You can listen to them online for free. For a complete list of messages, please go to http://westcoastwitness.com/2009/07/30/want-to-listen-to-some-great-lessons-online-2009-campus-ministry-united-workshop-audio-posted/.

Seeing the Invisible People

"Terry," a co-worker said to me this morning, "I just heard a commercial on the radio saying that one in eight Americans deal with malnutrition each year. Do you really believe that could be true?"

I surprised her with my answer: "Yes."

Hungry people in America seem to be invisible, but they exist in large numbers (especially among children of the poor). After eight and a half years involved in an urban ministry (www.contactchurch.net), I know that hungry people exist. I have seen the invisible people.

I have seen the face of the child in my wife's Sunday school class who told her, "I'm sad...We ran out of food."

I have seen the recently released convict who lived in cheap motels, working as a day laborer, and asking for a little help with groceries.

I have seen children who have been taken into state custody because their parents were too high on drugs and alcohol to provide for them.

I have seen a child with Down syndrome born to a prostitute with a half dozen other children whom she was struggling to feed.

I have seen an elderly man with emphysema living alone on social security and needing groceries.

I have seen a middle-aged mentally disabled man trying to making it alone in this world.

Yes, I can believe that a large number of Americans struggle with malnutrition each year. And I have seen a church making a difference in their lives by expressing its faith in Christ through loving its invisible neighbors.

"Then the righteous will answer him, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?'

"The King will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me'" (Matthew 25:37-40).

Christopher's Excellent Weekend

Christopher spent the weekend with Grammie and Jack. He caught his first fish all by himself. It was a catfish weighing 2 or 3 pounds.

He went on his first real train ride in Springdale, Arkansas. It was "awesome" and "cool."

The Effective Ambassador-Warrior

Sports Illustrated has a great article about Heisman trophy winner Tim Tebow in its current issue. The young quarterback's life illustrates how to be effective in sharing the Christian faith. As writer Austin Murphey put it, "Having covered Tim for three years, I would say he's the most effective ambassador-warrior for his faith I've come across in 25 years at SI."

The story may be read at http://vault.sportsillustrated.cnn.com/vault/article/magazine/MAG1158168/1/index.htm.

"Likewise, urge the younger men to be self-controlled. Show yourself in all respects to be a model of good works, and in your teaching show integrity, dignity, and sound speech that cannot be condemned, so that an opponent may be put to shame, having nothing evil to say about us" (Titus 2:6-8, English Standard Version).

Important Reading Material

Here are a few links to important reading material on the Internet:

At http://relit.org/pastordad/toc.php, you will find a new free e-book (Pastor Dad) by Mark Driscoll. He encourages fathers to be the kind of fathers they should be.

Anthony Bradley tackles the tough topic of why children raised in Christian families walk away from the faith at http://online.worldmag.com/2009/07/15/from-youth-group-to-agnosticism-part-i/ and http://online.worldmag.com/2009/07/22/from-youth-group-to-agnosticism-part-2/. Christian parents will be especially interested in this topic.

At www.theresurgence.com/series/Masculinity_Reclaimed, Joel Virgo helps churches that want to reach men and help them to develop into the men that God wants them to be. (Start at the bottom of the page and scroll up on this one.)

Finally, Albert Mohler shows how the rejection of the doctrine of biblical inerrancy leads one to reject other biblical teachings at www.albertmohler.com/blog_read.php?id=4140.

Use Words if Necessary?

Francis of Assisi has been credited with saying, "Preach the Gospel at all times. Use words if necessary."

I am not certain what he intended when he said those words, but I have seen the quote used to justify being silent about the gospel of Christ. The problem with such an application of Francis' words is: It's always necessary to use words to preach the gospel.

If one concentrates on doing good deeds without telling others about his motivation (the gospel), he risks stealing the glory away from God. Christ should be honored by the Christian's good deeds, but how will anyone know to honor Christ if the Christian is silent about him? As Max Lucado has said, "If we ever get to the point where our goal is to have people say, 'What a wonderful person,' we're missing the mark. Instead, our goal is to have people say, 'What a wonderful God this person serves.' Our task is to have people say, 'Tell me about your God,' and to point people to him." As Jesus Christ said, "(L)et your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven" (Matthew 5:16).

If someone is helping the poor and caring for the vulnerable, he may be doing God's work. However, if he is doing those things without letting anyone know about what Christ has done, he is not doing God's work. He is doing something that, at best, helps someone temporarily. At worst, he is doing those things to feel good about himself. In either case, he falls short of glorifying God. He sins.

The goal of Christians' good deeds is "so that in every way they will make the teaching about God our Savior attractive" (Titus 2:10). Good actions and attitudes enhance the credibility and attractiveness of the gospel, but they do not replace the gospel of what Christ has done. They are not intended to place the focus on Christians. They are intended to shift the focus to the Savior who has motivated and empowered us to love others.

In dying for our sins and being resurrected from the dead, Jesus Christ has done something worth mentioning to others. In ascending into heaven and promising to return, he motivates us to tell others about his accomplishments and promises. In sending the Holy Spirit to live in his people, he empowers us to lead God-honoring lives that point people to him as the Savior and Lord.

People need to hear about what Christ has done for them. Many are living in frustration, struggling with their sins, addictions, and inadequacies without help from above. They need to hear about the hope of heaven and the warnings of hell. They need the opportunity to believe. They need the opportunity to repent. They need the opportunity to bury their lives of futility and to be born again with a real reason to live.

We are doing no one any favors by remaining silent about Jesus. He has done something special, and everyone needs to know it.

Use words. They are necessary.

"He said to them, 'Go into all the world and preach the good news to all creation. Whoever believes and is baptized will be saved, but whoever does not believe will be condemned" (Mark 16:15-16).