I tried to embed the video of John Piper's sermon on this topic earlier today, but I could not get it to start at the beginning. So I'm linking to the video and the sermon notes. Hopefully, this will work better. The link is below:
Racial Harmony and Interracial Marriage
Showing posts with label Marriage. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Marriage. Show all posts
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
Thursday, June 09, 2011
Something Special in Memphis
I witnessed something special while on vacation in Memphis, Tennessee, this week.
The National Civil Rights Museum had nothing to do with it. The musicians of Beale Street were not involved. Neither the panda bears nor the Komodo dragons at the Memphis Zoo had anything to do with it.
Instead, it involved a small family eating lunch together at the Incredible Pizza Company.
When I first caught a glimpse of the husband, he didn't appear to be anything special. He looked a little overweight and unkempt as he picked up a tray and a couple of plates to fill with pizza. Nobody special, I assumed.
However, he began to seem quite a bit more special as he approached the table where his wife and young son were sitting. They were waiting patiently as the husband and father brought their meals to them.
As the man left the table in order to get his own pizza, I noticed his wife for the first time. She looked like a normal young woman in her twenties, but something about the manner in which her head jerked and her hands trembled indicated a problem with her motor skills. Upon a closer look, I realized that she was sitting in a wheelchair.
Had the young woman experienced a stroke or suffered a severe brain injury during an accident in the couple of years since her son's birth? I didn't know. But I knew that I had just witnessed something special: a man who was serious about loving his wife and providing his son with a good example.
This man had not merely remained with his wife following her debilitating injury. He had not merely met her basic physical needs. This man went out of his way to serve his wife.
He made sure that his wife would be present for both the meal and the games that their son would play afterwards in the restaurant's arcade. She would not be able to fully participate, but her husband made certain that she would at least be there.
It was simple, but thoughtful. It was something special in Memphis.
"Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman..." (1 Peter 3:7).
The National Civil Rights Museum had nothing to do with it. The musicians of Beale Street were not involved. Neither the panda bears nor the Komodo dragons at the Memphis Zoo had anything to do with it.
Instead, it involved a small family eating lunch together at the Incredible Pizza Company.
When I first caught a glimpse of the husband, he didn't appear to be anything special. He looked a little overweight and unkempt as he picked up a tray and a couple of plates to fill with pizza. Nobody special, I assumed.
However, he began to seem quite a bit more special as he approached the table where his wife and young son were sitting. They were waiting patiently as the husband and father brought their meals to them.
As the man left the table in order to get his own pizza, I noticed his wife for the first time. She looked like a normal young woman in her twenties, but something about the manner in which her head jerked and her hands trembled indicated a problem with her motor skills. Upon a closer look, I realized that she was sitting in a wheelchair.
Had the young woman experienced a stroke or suffered a severe brain injury during an accident in the couple of years since her son's birth? I didn't know. But I knew that I had just witnessed something special: a man who was serious about loving his wife and providing his son with a good example.
This man had not merely remained with his wife following her debilitating injury. He had not merely met her basic physical needs. This man went out of his way to serve his wife.
He made sure that his wife would be present for both the meal and the games that their son would play afterwards in the restaurant's arcade. She would not be able to fully participate, but her husband made certain that she would at least be there.
It was simple, but thoughtful. It was something special in Memphis.
"Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman..." (1 Peter 3:7).
Thursday, April 07, 2011
Stepping Up: A Call to Courageous Manhood
In his latest book, Dennis Rainey writes, "I believe there's something in the chest of a man that responds in a unique way to stories of courage. There's a piece of every man's heart that longs to be courageous, to be bold and gutsy and etch a masculine mark of bravery on the human landscape. In our hearts, we know that a part of the core of true manhood is courage" (page 5).
Stepping Up: A Call to Courageous Manhood contains many stories of courage to inspire a man's heart. From reciting tales of physical courage to feats of moral courage, Dennis Rainey demonstrates what it means to be a man through five stages of a man's life. In this book, he acknowledges the identity crisis that many men in our culture face due to poor training from fathers who were either silent, or missing, or who provided inappropriate advice and examples to their sons as their boys were growing up. But he meets men where they are and gives them the guidance and encouragement they need in order to take the next steps toward fulfilling their duties as men in their families and communities. Rather than approaching the subject in a condemning manner, Mr. Rainey seeks to instill the courage men need to take responsibility and initiative.
He outlines five stages in a man's life:
1. Boyhood: a time of adventure and exploration in which a boy needs guidance from responsible fathers and other men in his life. He needs to learn to differentiate wisdom from foolishness and how to love others. He needs to understand his spiritual identity, his sexual identity, and his purpose in life. As the author explains, "One of my favorite passages about children in the Scriptures is found in Psalm 127: 'Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, so are the children of one's youth. How blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them' (verses 4-5, NASB). This is powerful imagery. Think about what an arrow is created to do. Was it designed to stay in the quiver, comfortable and protected? No, it was made to be aimed and shot by a warrior at a target, to deliver a blow in battle. Can you see the connection? Boys need to understand that they are not here on earth just to achieve worldly success and comfort. They're here to strike a blow against evil, to make a mark on their world. Just like you. After all, dads are arrows too" (page 47).
2. Adolescence: a time of further training as a boy transitions into manhood. This is when a boy needs to start the process of thinking like a man. "They need help assassinating selfishness and pride...They need to learn and apply fundamental convictions and character qualities to real-life issues" (pages 78-79).
3. Manhood: a time in which a man takes the initiative and steps up to protect those in his care. Primarily, he protects his family, but he also takes responsibility to protect his community from evil. He does this physically, of course, by locking the doors of his home at night and holding his small child's hand while crossing the street. But that is rather easy. It gets more challenging when he seeks to protect his marriage by meeting the needs of his wife, when he seeks to instruct his children in the moral choices they face among their peers, when he stands up against unethical business practices on his job, or when he challenges his children's peers to treat each other with dignity. This is a time for courage to be displayed with wisdom.
4. Mentor: a time in which an experienced man teaches younger and less experienced men how to meet the challenges they face every day. He shares his successes and failures. He intentionally connects with younger men who want to approach life with more wisdom than they possess. He guides them in their quest to be the men God intended them to be. "A mentor purposefully builds life lessons into those he mentors," Dennis Rainey writes. "As you consider being a mentor, think through what makes life work for you--at work, at home, and in your relationship with Christ. What have you learned about the following?
*handling pressure and balancing the pace of life
*working with people
*building and keeping friendships with other men
*investing in your marriage
*resolving conflict
*facing unexpected crises or tragedy
*managing your finances
*developing a real relationship with God
*reading, understanding, and applying the Scriptures
*raising your children
*developing the type of character needed to succeed at work
*growing through failure" (page 147).
5. Patriarch: a time in which a man moves from the role of an authority figure to the role of a dignified older man who leads and impacts his world through the intentional good influence of his life. He keeps the extended family together. He connects with his adult children, their spouses, his grandchildren, and great-grandchildren. He refrains from exercising authority over the lives of his adult children--after all, they are leading their own families now--but he is always available to give wise counsel when asked. His priority is to have a positive influence on his extended family; and he spends much time in prayer for the future of his family. He works at leaving a good and godly legacy for his family and community.
Stepping Up: A Call to Courageous Manhood is an excellent book. I can highly recommend it for any man who wants some encouragement and guidance toward being a good man. I purchased the book from FamilyLife. It can be ordered at www.shopfamilylife.com/stepping-up.html or by calling 1-800-FLTODAY.
"Be watchful, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong. Let all that you do be done in love" (1 Corinthians 16:13-14).
Sunday, April 03, 2011
Guest Post at the Family Fountain Blog: The Challenge of Infertility
When my wife Janet and I were engaged to be married, we would talk for hours about our hopes and dreams. We would discuss careers, home life, and children. We planned to raise a household of biological and adopted children.
"The heart of man plans his way, but the LORD establishes his steps" (Proverbs 16:9, ESV). Our lives did not work out in quite the way we had planned. A couple of years into our marriage, we realized that we needed help. We had no children. After visiting a few doctors, we accepted our diagnosis. We were an infertile couple...
The rest of the post may be read on Warren Baldwin's Family Fountain blog at http://warrenbaldwin.blogspot.com/2011/04/guest-post-terry-laudett-challenge-of.html. You may also check out his blog by clicking on his name on my blog roll at the right side of this post. Thank you to Warren Baldwin for the opportunity to write a guest post for your blog!
"The heart of man plans his way, but the LORD establishes his steps" (Proverbs 16:9, ESV). Our lives did not work out in quite the way we had planned. A couple of years into our marriage, we realized that we needed help. We had no children. After visiting a few doctors, we accepted our diagnosis. We were an infertile couple...
The rest of the post may be read on Warren Baldwin's Family Fountain blog at http://warrenbaldwin.blogspot.com/2011/04/guest-post-terry-laudett-challenge-of.html. You may also check out his blog by clicking on his name on my blog roll at the right side of this post. Thank you to Warren Baldwin for the opportunity to write a guest post for your blog!
Saturday, March 05, 2011
Ordinary Christians
Sometimes it's good to notice the extraordinary impact of ordinary Christians around me.
These are the Christians who serve God faithfully without knowing how much of a difference they are making in the world around them.
They love and respect their husbands and wives. They honor their parents. They nurture, discipline, and instruct their children.
They show up to work on time and ready for the day. They approach their jobs with good attitudes. They care about their co-workers, employees, and customers. They take the time to listen to the concerns of others, sometimes offering helpful advice and sometimes offering a prayer. They are sincere in their gratitude when they are helped; and they are willing to help others whenever possible.
They spend time reading their Bibles and praying. They want to be close to their Lord. They want to know him better. They believe what they read in their Bibles; and they trust that God is listening to their pleas on behalf of the people for whom they pray.
They enjoy worshipping with their local churches. They participate in and teach Bible classes. They clean the church buildings. They mow the grass and shovel the snow on the church's property. They serve food when the church shares meals. They drive the vans to pick up people who want to worship with them.
They volunteer to help teachers at their local schools. They coach and support their children's sports teams. They are involved in their children's scouting programs. They e-mail and meet with their political leaders in support of just legislation or in opposition to unjust legislation. They raise money to fight diseases. They recycle paper, plastic, and aluminum products to help the environment. They get their pets from the local animal shelter.
They share the good news of Christ whenever an opportunity arises. They adopt children, volunteer for pro-life ministries, and sponsor children around the world through Christian relief organizations. They send money to organizations that fight global poverty and others that translate the Scriptures into native languages around the world.
They are ordinary Christians, but they are intentionally committed to doing good so that others are blessed and God is glorified.
"...let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven" (Matthew 5:16).
Friday, January 07, 2011
Making a Positive Impact
Sometimes Christians are best known for what we are against. We oppose same-sex marriage, abortion, and sexual immorality. We speak out against those sins; and that's absolutely appropriate. Those sins (among many others) are destroying us and the people we love. We can't remain silent. We care too much.
However, we cannot be satisfied with a purely negative approach when dealing with such issues. We need to be eager to do good in these areas.
How can we make a positive impact? We can...
*teach the biblical message about marriage, life, and sex.
*invite friends to marriage enrichment seminars.
*support a local crisis pregnancy resource center or adoption agency.
*mentor young husbands and fathers or wives and mothers.
*adopt a child.
*extend forgiveness and encouragement to those who have failed.
*let everyone know what Jesus Christ has done to take away our sins and to give us new lives.
The possibilities are nearly endless; and they have not been exhausted.
"And let our people learn to devote themselves to good works, so as to help cases of urgent need, and not be unfruitful" (Titus 3:14).
However, we cannot be satisfied with a purely negative approach when dealing with such issues. We need to be eager to do good in these areas.
How can we make a positive impact? We can...
*teach the biblical message about marriage, life, and sex.
*invite friends to marriage enrichment seminars.
*support a local crisis pregnancy resource center or adoption agency.
*mentor young husbands and fathers or wives and mothers.
*adopt a child.
*extend forgiveness and encouragement to those who have failed.
*let everyone know what Jesus Christ has done to take away our sins and to give us new lives.
The possibilities are nearly endless; and they have not been exhausted.
"And let our people learn to devote themselves to good works, so as to help cases of urgent need, and not be unfruitful" (Titus 3:14).
Saturday, November 06, 2010
Thankful
Since it's the month of Thanksgiving, I'm listing a few blessings for which I'm thankful today. I've been thinking about how much God has changed my life in the last 20 years in ways that I would not have imagined...but in ways for which I'm deeply thankful.
I'm thankful for my great wife. Janet and I have been married for 17 years. She has been my greatest encourager. She has been my best friend. She has been a wonderful partner in the joys and pains of life. No one could ask for a better wife.
I'm thankful for my outstanding son. Christopher is my 7-year old son. Before we were married, Janet and I talked about our dreams of adopting a child someday. We did not know that Christopher would be our only child, but we could not have asked for a more enjoyable little boy. It has been one of the honors of my life that God has entrusted me with the responsibilities and blessings of being Christopher's father.
I'm thankful for being a part of the Contact Church. Janet and I have been participants in the Tulsa urban ministry for 10 years. Eight years ago, the Contact Church was formed as a result of the urban ministry. Many people dream of being able to be a part of a church that reaches the urban poor. We have been blessed to experience it. We have been able to be a part of something very special.
I'm thankful for opportunities to share my faith. Nearly every day, I am asked by a co-worker, a friend, or an acquaintance about my faith in Jesus Christ. That was not happening until recent years. I have never had such opportunities fall into my lap so frequently. I can see God moving in the lives of others in my life every day. Also, I could not have imagined 20 years ago the opportunities that God has given me to share my faith through the internet. In addition to being able to reconnect through Facebook with friends and classmates from 25 years ago, I've been able to share my faith on this blog with people on every continent (except Antarctica). (I've been blown away when I have seen some of the countries from which I've seen visitors to this blog--especially those from closed Communist and Islamic nations.) It's hard to believe that God has entrusted me with such opportunities.
God has been very, very good to me.
"Make a joyful noise to the LORD,
all the earth!
Serve the LORD with gladness!
Come into his presence with singing!
"Know that the LORD, he is God!
It is he who made us, and we are his;
we are his people, and the sheep of
his pasture.
"Enter his gates with thanksgiving,
and his courts with praise!
Give thanks to him; bless his name!
"For the LORD is good;
his steadfast love endures forever,
and his faithfulness to all generations" (Psalm 100).
I'm thankful for my great wife. Janet and I have been married for 17 years. She has been my greatest encourager. She has been my best friend. She has been a wonderful partner in the joys and pains of life. No one could ask for a better wife.
I'm thankful for my outstanding son. Christopher is my 7-year old son. Before we were married, Janet and I talked about our dreams of adopting a child someday. We did not know that Christopher would be our only child, but we could not have asked for a more enjoyable little boy. It has been one of the honors of my life that God has entrusted me with the responsibilities and blessings of being Christopher's father.
I'm thankful for being a part of the Contact Church. Janet and I have been participants in the Tulsa urban ministry for 10 years. Eight years ago, the Contact Church was formed as a result of the urban ministry. Many people dream of being able to be a part of a church that reaches the urban poor. We have been blessed to experience it. We have been able to be a part of something very special.
I'm thankful for opportunities to share my faith. Nearly every day, I am asked by a co-worker, a friend, or an acquaintance about my faith in Jesus Christ. That was not happening until recent years. I have never had such opportunities fall into my lap so frequently. I can see God moving in the lives of others in my life every day. Also, I could not have imagined 20 years ago the opportunities that God has given me to share my faith through the internet. In addition to being able to reconnect through Facebook with friends and classmates from 25 years ago, I've been able to share my faith on this blog with people on every continent (except Antarctica). (I've been blown away when I have seen some of the countries from which I've seen visitors to this blog--especially those from closed Communist and Islamic nations.) It's hard to believe that God has entrusted me with such opportunities.
God has been very, very good to me.
"Make a joyful noise to the LORD,
all the earth!
Serve the LORD with gladness!
Come into his presence with singing!
"Know that the LORD, he is God!
It is he who made us, and we are his;
we are his people, and the sheep of
his pasture.
"Enter his gates with thanksgiving,
and his courts with praise!
Give thanks to him; bless his name!
"For the LORD is good;
his steadfast love endures forever,
and his faithfulness to all generations" (Psalm 100).
Sunday, August 08, 2010
Was Jesus Silent About Homosexuality?
In recent years, I have read this argument from those who urge followers of Christ to accept homosexuality: Since Jesus was silent about homosexuality, Christians should recognize it as being acceptable to God.
While it's true that the Scriptures never quote Jesus using the term "homosexuality," it's not exactly true that he did not address the topic.
Jesus affirmed the view that sexuality is properly expressed only between a man and a woman who are married to each other. In answering a question about divorce, he took his listeners back to the original purpose of marriage. "He answered, 'Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, "Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh?" (Matthew 19:4-5). Marriage was designed so that a man and a woman would become "one flesh." They would become intimate.
Apart from a marriage between a man and a woman, Jesus referred to all other expressions of sexuality as "sexual immorality" (see Matthew 5:32 and 15:19).
Jesus never deviated from that standard. In fact, he raised it. He prohibited even the intent behind sexual sin. He taught, "You have heard that it was said, 'You shall not commit adultery.' But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart" (Matthew 5:27-28).
However, it should be pointed out that Christ died for those of us who have failed to live up to his standards...and that includes all of us. He has always welcomed everyone who has been changed by the message of his death and resurrection into his church. He has been forgiving our sins and changing our lives since the earliest years of the church. "Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. And such were some of you. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God" (1 Corinthians 6:9-11).
Jesus condemned homosexuality along with all other forms of sexual immorality. But he also died in the place of the sexual sinner. Christ wants to free him or her from the guilt of the past.
While it's true that the Scriptures never quote Jesus using the term "homosexuality," it's not exactly true that he did not address the topic.
Jesus affirmed the view that sexuality is properly expressed only between a man and a woman who are married to each other. In answering a question about divorce, he took his listeners back to the original purpose of marriage. "He answered, 'Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, "Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh?" (Matthew 19:4-5). Marriage was designed so that a man and a woman would become "one flesh." They would become intimate.
Apart from a marriage between a man and a woman, Jesus referred to all other expressions of sexuality as "sexual immorality" (see Matthew 5:32 and 15:19).
Jesus never deviated from that standard. In fact, he raised it. He prohibited even the intent behind sexual sin. He taught, "You have heard that it was said, 'You shall not commit adultery.' But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart" (Matthew 5:27-28).
However, it should be pointed out that Christ died for those of us who have failed to live up to his standards...and that includes all of us. He has always welcomed everyone who has been changed by the message of his death and resurrection into his church. He has been forgiving our sins and changing our lives since the earliest years of the church. "Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. And such were some of you. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God" (1 Corinthians 6:9-11).
Jesus condemned homosexuality along with all other forms of sexual immorality. But he also died in the place of the sexual sinner. Christ wants to free him or her from the guilt of the past.
Thursday, June 03, 2010
Truth in Blogging
If you have read my blog for very long, you will not be surprised by anything that I am about to share. But I thought it might be a good idea to write a few words about myself and my perspectives so that any reader would know where I'm coming from theologically and socially.
My Theology
I am a member of the Church of Christ. My theology can be best described as conservative evangelical. I don't try to be innovative in doctrine. I try to be accurate and biblically orthodox. For example,
I believe in the doctrine of the trinity. I believe that the Father, the Son (Jesus Christ), and the Holy Spirit are (or is) God. (I'm not sure how to write that sentence in a grammatically correct way.) I believe that God is all-powerful, all-knowing, always present in his creation, and completely holy in his character.
I believe that God created the universe as it is revealed in Genesis. I believe that he prepared the earth for people in six days. I believe that he made Adam and Eve in his image from the dust of the ground on the sixth day.
I believe that Satan tempted Eve. I believe that the sin of Adam led to the corruption of a good universe and to the alienation between God and man.
I believe in the death, burial, and resurrection of Jesus Christ. I believe that he needed to die in my place in order to turn away God's just wrath against me and sinners like me. His resurrection gives me confidence that his Father accepted his sacrifice on my behalf.
I believe that I am saved by God's grace (as seen in Christ's death, burial, and resurrection) through faith (in Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior) apart from any work on my part that could cause anyone to think that I deserved to be saved.
I believe that the Holy Spirit lives in God's church today. I believe that he is active in making believers more like Jesus.
I believe that the Holy Spirit inspired the words of the Bible. I believe that the Bible was given to humanity as God's completely accurate message to us...without error because God is completely honest and completely competent.
I believe that repentant believers in Christ need to be baptized, because we need to identify with the death, burial, and resurrection of Christ. We need to be able to mark the end of our lives without Christ and the beginning of our lives with Christ.
I believe that Christ's church consists all repentant baptized believers who are committed to following Jesus Christ and glorifying God.
I believe that Jesus Christ will return and usher in new heavens and a new earth that will be the home of righteousness. The Day of Judgment will come. Heaven and hell are equally real and equally eternal.
My Social Concerns
This will be much shorter.
I am concerned about loving people. According to Jesus, it's the second greatest commandment (behind loving God).
I concentrate on loving the people around me first. I want to be a good husband, father, son, brother, employee, neighbor, citizen, and church member.
Then, I focus on broader social concerns that affect people. Many of my posts will reveal that I think a lot about abortion, adoption, caring for God's creation, poverty, racial harmony, and strengthening marriages and families.
If anyone was confused about where I'm coming from, I hope this helps. I try to be honest and open.
My Theology
I am a member of the Church of Christ. My theology can be best described as conservative evangelical. I don't try to be innovative in doctrine. I try to be accurate and biblically orthodox. For example,
I believe in the doctrine of the trinity. I believe that the Father, the Son (Jesus Christ), and the Holy Spirit are (or is) God. (I'm not sure how to write that sentence in a grammatically correct way.) I believe that God is all-powerful, all-knowing, always present in his creation, and completely holy in his character.
I believe that God created the universe as it is revealed in Genesis. I believe that he prepared the earth for people in six days. I believe that he made Adam and Eve in his image from the dust of the ground on the sixth day.
I believe that Satan tempted Eve. I believe that the sin of Adam led to the corruption of a good universe and to the alienation between God and man.
I believe in the death, burial, and resurrection of Jesus Christ. I believe that he needed to die in my place in order to turn away God's just wrath against me and sinners like me. His resurrection gives me confidence that his Father accepted his sacrifice on my behalf.
I believe that I am saved by God's grace (as seen in Christ's death, burial, and resurrection) through faith (in Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior) apart from any work on my part that could cause anyone to think that I deserved to be saved.
I believe that the Holy Spirit lives in God's church today. I believe that he is active in making believers more like Jesus.
I believe that the Holy Spirit inspired the words of the Bible. I believe that the Bible was given to humanity as God's completely accurate message to us...without error because God is completely honest and completely competent.
I believe that repentant believers in Christ need to be baptized, because we need to identify with the death, burial, and resurrection of Christ. We need to be able to mark the end of our lives without Christ and the beginning of our lives with Christ.
I believe that Christ's church consists all repentant baptized believers who are committed to following Jesus Christ and glorifying God.
I believe that Jesus Christ will return and usher in new heavens and a new earth that will be the home of righteousness. The Day of Judgment will come. Heaven and hell are equally real and equally eternal.
My Social Concerns
This will be much shorter.
I am concerned about loving people. According to Jesus, it's the second greatest commandment (behind loving God).
I concentrate on loving the people around me first. I want to be a good husband, father, son, brother, employee, neighbor, citizen, and church member.
Then, I focus on broader social concerns that affect people. Many of my posts will reveal that I think a lot about abortion, adoption, caring for God's creation, poverty, racial harmony, and strengthening marriages and families.
If anyone was confused about where I'm coming from, I hope this helps. I try to be honest and open.
Sunday, May 09, 2010
How to Make Your Wife Feel Secure in Your Love
In this video, Robertson McQuilken explains why he resigned as president of Columbia Bible College and Seminary after his wife was diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease. It's the story of a man who made it his priority to help his wife feel secure in his love.
"Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church..." (Ephesians 5:25).
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
An Update on the Weekend to Remember Contest
Last month, I conducted a contest on this blog. My wife and I paid the registration fees for two couples to attend FamilyLife's A Weekend to Remember marriage conferences.
Last night, one of the winning couples let me know that they attended one of the conferences in New England last weekend. They were grateful for the opportunity to rebuild their relationship with God and their marriage. They let me know that the conference exceeded all their expectations.
I was thankful for the update. God had used my blog to help others and to honor his name.
I don't know how many people read this blog, but I suspect that it is relatively few. I don't know how either of the contest winners even found my blog. But I am thankful that God has used this blog to bless a few other people and to show people a little more clearly his goodness.
I want to add this encouragement to any fellow bloggers who may stumble upon this blog: Please don't waste your blog. Concentrate on blessing other people and glorifying God with your blog. You don't need to be a professional minister to make a difference. (I deliver the mail for a living.) You don't need to have many readers. You can make a difference with what God has given you.
"...grace was given to each one of us according to the measure of Christ's gift" (Ephesians 4:7).
Use it to honor him.
Last night, one of the winning couples let me know that they attended one of the conferences in New England last weekend. They were grateful for the opportunity to rebuild their relationship with God and their marriage. They let me know that the conference exceeded all their expectations.
I was thankful for the update. God had used my blog to help others and to honor his name.
I don't know how many people read this blog, but I suspect that it is relatively few. I don't know how either of the contest winners even found my blog. But I am thankful that God has used this blog to bless a few other people and to show people a little more clearly his goodness.
I want to add this encouragement to any fellow bloggers who may stumble upon this blog: Please don't waste your blog. Concentrate on blessing other people and glorifying God with your blog. You don't need to be a professional minister to make a difference. (I deliver the mail for a living.) You don't need to have many readers. You can make a difference with what God has given you.
"...grace was given to each one of us according to the measure of Christ's gift" (Ephesians 4:7).
Use it to honor him.
Saturday, February 13, 2010
The Courage of Valentine
Valentine was a minister of the church in the late third century A.D. While little is known about him, he was believed to have been arrested during a time of Christian persecution in the Roman Empire because he was performing the wedding ceremonies of Christians. The public nature of his ministry drew the attention of the authorities. Valentine could have faced merely time in prison, but he decided to take another risk when he stood before the Roman emperor in his trial. Realizing the fate awaiting the emperor, the saint tried to persuade him to follow Jesus Christ. This infuriated the emperor. As a result, Valentine was beheaded.
The brave Valentine died because he cared about loving Christian marriages as well as people who were heading toward eternity without the benefit of Christ in their lives.
He serves as a role model of love and courage to this day.
The brave Valentine died because he cared about loving Christian marriages as well as people who were heading toward eternity without the benefit of Christ in their lives.
He serves as a role model of love and courage to this day.
Thursday, January 28, 2010
Who Does God Want to be Elders?
"This is why I left you in Crete, so that you might put what remained into order, and appoint elders in every town as I directed you--if anyone is above reproach, the husband of one wife, and his children are believers and not open to the charge of debauchery or insubordination. For an overseer, as God's steward, must be above reproach. He must not be arrogant or quick-tempered or a drunkard or violent or greedy for gain, but hospitable, a lover of good, self-controlled, upright, holy, and disciplined. He must hold firm to the trustworthy word as taught, so that he may be able to give instruction in sound doctrine and also to rebuke those who contradict it" (Titus 1:5-9).
God is looking for men who are above reproach to serve as overseers and pastors in his church. In other words, God insists that a leader in his churches be...
*the husband of one wife. He must be a man who is faithful to his wife. His relationship with his wife will be a model of how Christ loves his church.
*a father whose children are believers and not open to the charge of debauchery or insubordination. He must be one who can lead his children in the right way. (I have read commentaries that downplay this quality in a pastor; but as a father, I have some understanding of why God requires this now. Children do not grow up naturally to be faithful and decent human beings. Fathers need to work to ensure that this happens. Such experience is absolutely required for the work of an overseer.)
*a man who is not arrogant or quick-tempered or a drunkard or violent or greedy for gain. He cannot be one who thinks he knows everything. He cannot walk around with a chip on his shoulder, looking for an argument or a fight. He cannot allow drugs or alcohol to gain control over him. He cannot beat up his wife, his children, or others under his care. He cannot be a man who would cheat or steal or lie in order to get what he wants from another. Such characteristics will destroy a man and the church he is called to care for.
*a man who is hospitable, a lover of good, self-controlled, upright, holy, and disciplined. He needs to be a friendly and generous man, a man who will share his time and his resources to benefit another. He must love the good things in life...things like honor, kindness, justice, and purity. He needs to be in control of his actions and reactions. He needs to be stable and reliable. He must be ethical...to the point that others would say that there is something different about him. His honesty should never be questioned by any rational person.
*a man who holds firm to the trustworthy word as taught by the apostles and prophets. He needs to be able to teach healthy doctrine that conforms with the will of God, doctrine that accurately conveys God's message for people within the church and beyond. He will need to be able to handle the word of God with enough expertise to defend it against those who would deny it or try to change it. (An elder may need to challenge a preacher with a doctorate in theology if that preacher is denying such fundamental teachings as the inerrancy of Scripture, the need for faith in Jesus Christ in order to be saved, or the omniscience of God. He needs to be prepared to recognize sound doctrine from unhealthy faith-destroying doctrine; and he needs to have the courage to defend the good and to challenge the bad...even when he must take on a popular false teacher within his congregation.)
Such elders will serve churches well.
God is looking for men who are above reproach to serve as overseers and pastors in his church. In other words, God insists that a leader in his churches be...
*the husband of one wife. He must be a man who is faithful to his wife. His relationship with his wife will be a model of how Christ loves his church.
*a father whose children are believers and not open to the charge of debauchery or insubordination. He must be one who can lead his children in the right way. (I have read commentaries that downplay this quality in a pastor; but as a father, I have some understanding of why God requires this now. Children do not grow up naturally to be faithful and decent human beings. Fathers need to work to ensure that this happens. Such experience is absolutely required for the work of an overseer.)
*a man who is not arrogant or quick-tempered or a drunkard or violent or greedy for gain. He cannot be one who thinks he knows everything. He cannot walk around with a chip on his shoulder, looking for an argument or a fight. He cannot allow drugs or alcohol to gain control over him. He cannot beat up his wife, his children, or others under his care. He cannot be a man who would cheat or steal or lie in order to get what he wants from another. Such characteristics will destroy a man and the church he is called to care for.
*a man who is hospitable, a lover of good, self-controlled, upright, holy, and disciplined. He needs to be a friendly and generous man, a man who will share his time and his resources to benefit another. He must love the good things in life...things like honor, kindness, justice, and purity. He needs to be in control of his actions and reactions. He needs to be stable and reliable. He must be ethical...to the point that others would say that there is something different about him. His honesty should never be questioned by any rational person.
*a man who holds firm to the trustworthy word as taught by the apostles and prophets. He needs to be able to teach healthy doctrine that conforms with the will of God, doctrine that accurately conveys God's message for people within the church and beyond. He will need to be able to handle the word of God with enough expertise to defend it against those who would deny it or try to change it. (An elder may need to challenge a preacher with a doctorate in theology if that preacher is denying such fundamental teachings as the inerrancy of Scripture, the need for faith in Jesus Christ in order to be saved, or the omniscience of God. He needs to be prepared to recognize sound doctrine from unhealthy faith-destroying doctrine; and he needs to have the courage to defend the good and to challenge the bad...even when he must take on a popular false teacher within his congregation.)
Such elders will serve churches well.
Sunday, January 03, 2010
A Weekend to Remember Contest
Three years ago, I won tickets from a local radio station to attend FamilyLife's A Weekend to Remember marriage conference. Janet and I had a great time.
During the conference, we learned about the biblical plan for the role of husbands, the role of wives, valuing each other as God's gifts, sexual intimacy, communication, and many other subjects. The speakers were insightful and humorous. They even set aside time on Saturday night for couples to have a date night together. It truly lived up to its name. It was a weekend to remember.
Since we enjoyed the conference so much, Janet and I have decided to pay the registration for another couple to experience A Weekend to Remember. The conferences are being held across the United States and in Canada this spring. You may find information about dates, locations, and other details at www.weekendtoremember.com.
In order to win registration to A Weekend to Remember, please leave a comment on this post. The contest will be open until 12:01 am January 10, 2010. Next Sunday, I will randomly draw one name from the comments section of the reader who will win the registration. (Sorry, but we cannot pay for your hotel room and meals; but the registration fee is valued at $258, so it is still a very valuable prize for a blog contest.) If you are the winner, we will get your mailing address and instruct FamilyLife to send a gift certificate for you and your spouse to attend the conference of your choice.
Of course, if no one enters the contest, Janet and I will enjoy another Weekend to Remember ourselves. But we hope others will take advantage of this opportunity to possibly win this prize.
During the conference, we learned about the biblical plan for the role of husbands, the role of wives, valuing each other as God's gifts, sexual intimacy, communication, and many other subjects. The speakers were insightful and humorous. They even set aside time on Saturday night for couples to have a date night together. It truly lived up to its name. It was a weekend to remember.
Since we enjoyed the conference so much, Janet and I have decided to pay the registration for another couple to experience A Weekend to Remember. The conferences are being held across the United States and in Canada this spring. You may find information about dates, locations, and other details at www.weekendtoremember.com.
In order to win registration to A Weekend to Remember, please leave a comment on this post. The contest will be open until 12:01 am January 10, 2010. Next Sunday, I will randomly draw one name from the comments section of the reader who will win the registration. (Sorry, but we cannot pay for your hotel room and meals; but the registration fee is valued at $258, so it is still a very valuable prize for a blog contest.) If you are the winner, we will get your mailing address and instruct FamilyLife to send a gift certificate for you and your spouse to attend the conference of your choice.
Of course, if no one enters the contest, Janet and I will enjoy another Weekend to Remember ourselves. But we hope others will take advantage of this opportunity to possibly win this prize.
Thursday, September 17, 2009
Sharing the Grace of Life for 16 Years
The apostle Peter described marriage as a husband and wife sharing the "grace of life" (1 Peter 3:7, English Standard Version). Tomorrow, Janet and I will celebrate our 16th anniversary of sharing the grace of life with each other. Happy anniversary, Janet!
Sunday, September 13, 2009
Before You File for Divorce
...understand that the constant prayer of your children will be, "God, please bring my mom and dad back together again." Please don't give them a reason to say that prayer.
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
The Family Room - Finding Men Worthy of Marriage
FamilyLife's The Family Room contains a good article about the need to
find men worth marrying. Author Voddie Baucham contends that fathers need to help their daughters recognize the essential qualities to seek in a potential husband, and they need to help their sons to develop those qualities.
Voddie Baucham writes, "I believe God has spoken rather decisively in His Word about what our daughters should look for. Moreover, I believe there are some non-negotiables that our daughters must be looking for. There are some things a man simply must be before he is qualified to assume the role of a Christian husband. For instance, he must be a Christian (2 Corinthians 6:14); he must be committed to biblical headship (Ephesians5:23ff.); he must welcome children (Psalm 127:3-5); he must be a suitable priest (Joshua 24:15), prophet (Ephesians 6:4), protector (Nehemiah 4:13-14), and provider (1 Timothy 5:8; Titus 2:5). A man who does not possess--or at least show strong signs of--these and other basic characteristics does not meet the basic job description laid down for husbands in the Bible.
"Moreover, as a father, it is my responsibility to teach my daughter what these requirements are, encourage her not to settle for less, and walk with her through the process of evaluating potential suitors. Of course, these ideas may come as a shock to many in contemporary Christian circles (not to mention society at large). However, I have found that there is a growing discontentment among young women today. They are tired of being thrown to the wolves. They are also tired of feeling like they have to settle for less than God's best. My question is, why should they?"
For more excerpts from Mr. Baucham's book What He Must Be if He Wants to Marry My Daughter, please click on the link below.
find men worth marrying. Author Voddie Baucham contends that fathers need to help their daughters recognize the essential qualities to seek in a potential husband, and they need to help their sons to develop those qualities.Voddie Baucham writes, "I believe God has spoken rather decisively in His Word about what our daughters should look for. Moreover, I believe there are some non-negotiables that our daughters must be looking for. There are some things a man simply must be before he is qualified to assume the role of a Christian husband. For instance, he must be a Christian (2 Corinthians 6:14); he must be committed to biblical headship (Ephesians5:23ff.); he must welcome children (Psalm 127:3-5); he must be a suitable priest (Joshua 24:15), prophet (Ephesians 6:4), protector (Nehemiah 4:13-14), and provider (1 Timothy 5:8; Titus 2:5). A man who does not possess--or at least show strong signs of--these and other basic characteristics does not meet the basic job description laid down for husbands in the Bible.
"Moreover, as a father, it is my responsibility to teach my daughter what these requirements are, encourage her not to settle for less, and walk with her through the process of evaluating potential suitors. Of course, these ideas may come as a shock to many in contemporary Christian circles (not to mention society at large). However, I have found that there is a growing discontentment among young women today. They are tired of being thrown to the wolves. They are also tired of feeling like they have to settle for less than God's best. My question is, why should they?"
For more excerpts from Mr. Baucham's book What He Must Be if He Wants to Marry My Daughter, please click on the link below.
Thursday, July 16, 2009
A Blog for Dads
"Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord" (Ephesians 6:4).Each workday morning, I start the day reading my Bible and a few of my favorite blogs as I eat my breakfast. (I go to work a few hours before Janet and Christopher need to get up.) Tony Dungy's blog (http://allprodad.com/dungy) is one of my favorites. With each entry, he encourages men to be good husbands and fathers. Men, if you want to start the day off well, read Tony Dungy's blog. You will find encouragement and inspiration as you begin the day.
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Why Sex Is So Important
"May your fountain be blessed,
and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth.
A loving doe, a graceful deer--
may her breasts satisfy you always,
may you ever be captivated by her love" (Proverbs 5:18-19).
The FamilyLife Culture Watch blog has posted two good articles about the importance of sex.
"Why Sex Is So Important to Your Husband" by Barbara Rainey is available at www.familylifeculturewatch.com/2009/02/why-sex-is-so-important-to-your-husband.html.
"Why Sex Is So Important to Your Wife" by Dennis Rainey is available at www.familylifeculturewatch.com/2009/02/why-sex-is-so-important-to-your-wife.html.
In addition, FamilyLife's A Weekend to Remember marriage conference will be in Tulsa on March 20-22. It's a great conference. It will also take place in different cities around the country this spring. More information may be obtained at www.familylifeweekend.com.
and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth.
A loving doe, a graceful deer--
may her breasts satisfy you always,
may you ever be captivated by her love" (Proverbs 5:18-19).
The FamilyLife Culture Watch blog has posted two good articles about the importance of sex.
"Why Sex Is So Important to Your Husband" by Barbara Rainey is available at www.familylifeculturewatch.com/2009/02/why-sex-is-so-important-to-your-husband.html.
"Why Sex Is So Important to Your Wife" by Dennis Rainey is available at www.familylifeculturewatch.com/2009/02/why-sex-is-so-important-to-your-wife.html.
In addition, FamilyLife's A Weekend to Remember marriage conference will be in Tulsa on March 20-22. It's a great conference. It will also take place in different cities around the country this spring. More information may be obtained at www.familylifeweekend.com.
Friday, January 23, 2009
Poverty
"The poor you will always have with you..." (Matthew 26:11).
I have been thinking about Jesus' comment that we will always have the poor with us. Why would he say that?
I have come to believe that Jesus considered poverty a perpetual problem in this life because of its multifaceted and complex causes. This is a list of a few of the causes of poverty that I have observed over the years:
1. Disabilities. People with mental, physical, and emotional disabilities can have a difficult time finding and retaining jobs that pay living wages. Their disabilities may be congenital, or they may be due to injury. A mentally retarded man will not make good wages, no matter how hard he works. A wheelchair-bound woman with ALS will not be able to work. A man with schizophrenia will have great difficulty retaining his job. Furthermore, as much as they need it, those with disabilities will find it more difficult to find a job that offers health care benefits.
2. Dysfunctional Families/Divorce. Unstable families, divorce, and couples who live together outside of marriage create disadvantaged children. These children grow up dealing with issues of distrust and insecurity. Often, they deal with depression and the cultivation of unhealthy relationships. They look for love, but tend to find it in the wrong places. They can have emotional scars that hinder their ability to make wise choices in life. They are more likely to repeat the sins of their parents and repeat the cycle for the next generation. Since divorce and single parenthood disrupts family income, poverty often follows.
When a child grows up physically, sexually, or emotionally abused, the impact follows him or her throughout life. They will be prone to depression or to violence or to both. They will be haunted by their past. It will be terribly hard for them to make wise decisions about their future as they run from their past. Suicide is a strong temptation in their worldview. They do not have the strength to fight their battles alone. They were robbed of their dignity in childhood. They will face very difficult days as adults. Their finances are merely one of their problems.
3. Drug and Alcohol Abuse. Drug addicts and drunkards have very difficult lives. They do not enjoy healthy relationships. They have trouble finding and maintaining good jobs. Sometimes the drug and alcohol abuse starts as a result of the first two causes of poverty. They try to self-medicate in an effort to escape their problems of physical, emotional, or mental pain. Sometimes the addiction starts because of an effort to fit in with friends who are abusing drugs and alcohol. They make irrationally bad choices. In either case, drug and alcohol abuse does nothing but harm. Furthermore, if they become sober after spending time in jail or prison, the likelihood of ever finding a job paying above minimum wage is almost non-existent.
So do we give up on people in these kinds of situations? No. We come alongside them and become their friends. We share our time, resources, advice, and faith. They need true friends. They need the hope that comes from Christ. They need a new start to life, and the encouragement to persevere when the times get tough. Wealthier Christians do not need to passively shake their heads in sadness over their plights. Everyone can help in some way.
I have been thinking about Jesus' comment that we will always have the poor with us. Why would he say that?
I have come to believe that Jesus considered poverty a perpetual problem in this life because of its multifaceted and complex causes. This is a list of a few of the causes of poverty that I have observed over the years:
1. Disabilities. People with mental, physical, and emotional disabilities can have a difficult time finding and retaining jobs that pay living wages. Their disabilities may be congenital, or they may be due to injury. A mentally retarded man will not make good wages, no matter how hard he works. A wheelchair-bound woman with ALS will not be able to work. A man with schizophrenia will have great difficulty retaining his job. Furthermore, as much as they need it, those with disabilities will find it more difficult to find a job that offers health care benefits.
2. Dysfunctional Families/Divorce. Unstable families, divorce, and couples who live together outside of marriage create disadvantaged children. These children grow up dealing with issues of distrust and insecurity. Often, they deal with depression and the cultivation of unhealthy relationships. They look for love, but tend to find it in the wrong places. They can have emotional scars that hinder their ability to make wise choices in life. They are more likely to repeat the sins of their parents and repeat the cycle for the next generation. Since divorce and single parenthood disrupts family income, poverty often follows.
When a child grows up physically, sexually, or emotionally abused, the impact follows him or her throughout life. They will be prone to depression or to violence or to both. They will be haunted by their past. It will be terribly hard for them to make wise decisions about their future as they run from their past. Suicide is a strong temptation in their worldview. They do not have the strength to fight their battles alone. They were robbed of their dignity in childhood. They will face very difficult days as adults. Their finances are merely one of their problems.
3. Drug and Alcohol Abuse. Drug addicts and drunkards have very difficult lives. They do not enjoy healthy relationships. They have trouble finding and maintaining good jobs. Sometimes the drug and alcohol abuse starts as a result of the first two causes of poverty. They try to self-medicate in an effort to escape their problems of physical, emotional, or mental pain. Sometimes the addiction starts because of an effort to fit in with friends who are abusing drugs and alcohol. They make irrationally bad choices. In either case, drug and alcohol abuse does nothing but harm. Furthermore, if they become sober after spending time in jail or prison, the likelihood of ever finding a job paying above minimum wage is almost non-existent.
So do we give up on people in these kinds of situations? No. We come alongside them and become their friends. We share our time, resources, advice, and faith. They need true friends. They need the hope that comes from Christ. They need a new start to life, and the encouragement to persevere when the times get tough. Wealthier Christians do not need to passively shake their heads in sadness over their plights. Everyone can help in some way.
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